Polite Savages (tm)

The Office Holiday Party

The office holiday party is the most treacherous of all office events.  You're navigating the narrow waterway of fun between the Scylla and Charybdis of gossip and scandal.  The office holiday party is deceptively relaxing.  You think you can let loose and show your real self to your colleagues.  Don't do it!  You should keep your real self away from those people that can influence your professional life.  Just because everyone else is letting loose doesn't mean that they're not filing away facts for later use.  Even though your boss or subordinate might welcome your fun side, it doesn't mean that they won't judge you come a sober Monday morning. 

Regifting: Gifting the Green Way

     Green, eco-friendly . . . these are all terms that are bandied about in mainstream media.  It's trendy to be environementally conscious.  There are even eco-green-recycled-luxury vacations now.  Didn't the definition of luxury mean extravagance and therefore exess and waste?  How can we reconcile luxury and green?  That's the subject of a much bigger debate.  What we can do in our daily lives is to conserve, recycle and reduce our impact on the environment.  During the holiday season we can do that is by regifting.   

     What's not debatable is that people don't want to receive carbon credits or cards telling them that a donation has been made in their name to the save the world fund.  One small way to save the planet is to regift.  Many resources went into manufacturing, transporting and marketing those unwanted presents in your closet.  The more resourceful among us save these unwanted items to give away again.  Just because a gift is of no interest to you doesn't mean that it has no value to someone else.  Like the old saying goes, one person's trash is another person's treasure.  Regifting should be done in a way that the recipient doesn't realize that he/she is receiving a recycled present.  Some handy tips follow:

     1.  The item should be new and unused unless it's something like a Stradivarius violin.

     2.  If there's a gift tag, take it off.  Nothing is worse than receiving a gift that was so obviously meant for someone else. 

     3.  As with any other gift, make sure the gift is thoughtful and appropriate for its recipient.  For example don't give rollerblades to a wheelchair-bound friend. 

     4.  Obviously, don't regfit to the person that gave you the gift to begin with or to anyone who might be in contact with the original gifter.  People talk . . .   

No Offense

     Another phrase that should be avoided, "Not to be mean but . . . "  Uh, no.  The following statements will be mean. 

Put a Little Love in Your Heart

I read about the USPS's Operation Santa Claus on the City Room Blog of the New York Times today.  I was touched.  And not in a way that a non-profit organization would have to settle with me kind of way.  I read about children who sent letters (about 500,000) to Santa Claus through the mail.  Some of these letters are from people who are in real need of life's basics, clothing, shelter and food.  I read about people who volunteer to take the time and effort to go through the process of just being able to answer the letters.  They have to show government issued identification, sign agreements to guarantee privacy and probably some kind of release.  I hope to be that person and I hope that other people want to be that person too.  Though it's a small gesture, it can make a big difference in someone else's life.  This year, I will try to make the effort to be Santa Claus for just a brief moment.  I'll let you know how that goes.

Office Gifting

      There is no official office gifting policy where I work.  We don't have one of those horrible secret santa programs where everyone is inevitably disappointed or a strict no gift exchange at work policy.  Though I disparage these official gift programs, rules do make decision making easier. 

     Hurt feelings and confusion when there are no guidelines.  Here's some advice for those murky situations.

1.  Give to all or give to none.  Do not just give gifts to some people and not others in your department.  People talk and offense, however slight, will result. 

2.  Avoid religious references.  Though Christmas is now secularized, it is still a religious holiday.  Call them holiday gifts if you do decide to spread the joy.

3.  Gifts to the boss are not necessary (unless you work for a self-absorbed, greedy creature) and as a boss, I would not expect gifts from subordinates.  Bosses typically make more and really should reward subordinates with appropriate gifts.

4.  Give only appropriate gifts.  Appropriate for the professional environment and the moral, religious and other beliefs of the recipients.  Like don't send a Virgnia ham to a Jewish colleague that keeps kosher or a bottle of single malt scotch to a recovering alcoholic.  Also, adult gifts are never appropriate in the workplace.  You know what I mean.

5.  Manage your expectations.  If you give a gift, don't expect one in return.  After all, this season is about generosity which implies a bit of selflessness, eh?

6.  If there are rules, follow them.  For example if there is a dollar limit on gifts then stick to it.  Don't showboat.

Any questions?  Feel free to comment or email me.